Love is in the Air. No seriously it’s Everywhere - Get it off me!

By Lashana Turner

Sitting on the bus or train enjoying your journey as you do, you could find yourself reminded of all the important things you are ‘supposed’ to achieve before the end of college. The list goes something like this: good A level and GCSE grades, good weekend job, good work experience, FALL IN LOVE WITH A BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!
Now, this might seem bizarre and slightly random, but you may be just one of the many who find themselves being constantly bombarded with images and ideas of romance, sexual relations and love.

Young people today are becoming more and more obsessed with being in relationships. Some blame hormones, others condemn the media for its contribution. But with teenage pregnancy at an all time high, and levels of teenage suicide due to depression caused by bullying and peer pressure becoming more common, perhaps it is time someone addressed the issue of the teenager’s obsession with love, romance and relationships.

Everywhere we go we are plagued with images of happy couples and people in love. A ‘kissy face here’ and a ‘smoochykins’ there. We are constantly assured that happiness is found in two main things: money and love. Now, do not get me wrong, there are very few things more special than true young love, and if I was handed a cheque for one hundred million pounds I would gleefully take the money and buy my weight in French cheese just because I could. However if romance is constantly thrust upon younger more impressionable minds, the effects could be hazardous.

With love being promoted through music and television, and our peers constantly reinforcing the media’s convincing message, many can find themselves distressed if they are not in relationships or have not reached a certain level of intimacy.

The Love Cycle
I have found that when discussing relationships with young people, those who are not in relationships or who have never been, are either deeply worried by this and therefore desperate and insecure, or embarrassed and unwilling to discuss the topic. A vicious cycle begins when young people are pressured by peers and media, and brainwashed into believing that if they are not in a relationship or have not passed certain ‘bases’ then they are losers, outcasts and faulty human beings. This then forces them to tackle relationships and intimacy with fierce determination that should be focused on their education and future. The harder they try to fulfil their romantic needs, the further they plummet into the trap that causes them to continue the vicious love cycle. The person they are attracted to easily senses their fierce determination as desperation and so this can be used to exploit them for the person’s selfish needs or can cause them to be rejected. So now we have a depressed, perhaps used and abused or rejected and embarrassed young person being who feels they have no self worth and so they go through life experiencing the same things over and over again ending up with a big pile of failed relationships.

Love in the Media
A lot of the music aimed at young people is about romance and sexual relations. Songs that discuss being deeply in love are very popular. Even more popular are songs that glorify sex, all performed by relatively young people who would be idolised by pre-teens and teenagers worldwide. Perhaps musical artists should consider who their audience is, and how lyrics such as “you can have your way just as long as I can have you because I will do anything” and “promiscuous girl, you’re teasing me, you know what I want and I got what you need” will influence their audience into perhaps making wrong decisions and getting the wrong idea about romance and love.

Television shows and movies aimed at the youth constantly focus on young people in love. Even a violent action film has a scene where the hero gets the girl while a building blows up in the background. Films such as ‘High school musical’ that has seen great success with young people right down to the age of five, all the way through to sixteen, also focus on youngsters in love. The message of the film is clear. The two main characters ‘Troy’ and ‘Gabriella’ are unfulfilled until they meet each other. They only find happiness when they find love. This is the message constantly imposed on the youth.

The message young people get, and will continue to get, is that love and sex are the answers to all of your problems. What needs to happen is that more musicians need to promote fun and happiness as opposed to love, romance and sex. However this goes two ways. Young people need to be more aware of how to deal with their feelings, and so be able to listen to love songs and watch romantic films without it dramatically influencing their perceptions of their own lives.

As the youth of today we need to learn to open our eyes and not depend on a ‘relationship crutch’. We are young and have our whole lives ahead of us to find love and intimacy, right now we should focus our energy into investing time into our futures, as this is where the true rewards are.